


Percy Jackson trying to god

by ReZeta



Category: Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: F/M, Forced Marriage, Rape/Non-con Elements, Riddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:21:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25224544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReZeta/pseuds/ReZeta
Summary: Percy Jackson became a god, and it did not end well. Here I am playing with classical myths and tragedies.
Relationships: Artemis/Percy Jackson
Comments: 4
Kudos: 72





	1. Chapter 1

“Forgive me, my lord, but I refuse.”

The Council was silent. The gods frowned at each other like they must have misheard. Only Athena smiled, knowingly. I owed her.

"No?" Zeus said. "You are . . . turning down our generous gift?"

There was a dangerous edge to his voice, like a thunderstorm about to erupt.

“I am honored, my lord, but gift is not a gift if it’s already given. I killed Hyperion, lord of the East. His essence became mine.”

It was the truth. I felt it with every tingle of the muscle and electric impulse going through the brain. The power was there. It will simply take time to accustom to it.

Zeus eyed me. He was not angry – not any more than usual, but he was annoyed that I caught him. He could have given me a shadow of proper reward and keep me eternally grateful as a bonus.

Politics. You either enjoy it or you die.

“But I do wish to get a proper reward, my lord.”

Zeus sighed.

“If it is within our power, boy. Shall you wish for something we can’t give, and you will have only yourself to blame.”

I smiled.

“It is within your power specifically, my lord. It is not hard, but I have to ask you to swear on the River Styx that you will deliver.”

That got him thinking.

“You dare to doubt my word?”

“I dare not. But lord Hades taught me to always take a solemn oath.”

Hades nodded. I loved the guy. He was a cunt, but a predictable and diligent cunt.

"Very well!" Zeus growled. "In the name of the Council, we swear by the River Styx to grant your reasonable request as long as it is within our power."

The other gods muttered assent. Thunder boomed, shaking the throne room. The deal was made.

“I wish to marry your daughter, my lord.”

Annabeth looked at me like I slapped her. Athena nodded. My part of the deal was done. The woman hated the very idea of Poseidon's son fucking her scion, and I was happy to oblige. Her advice was more than worth it.

“As a polite young man, I ask the father for the bride’s hand.”

Zeus smirked. He was a sucker for flattery and ostensible signs of respect.

“And you are damn right to do so, boy. Tell me, which of my daughters captured your heart?”

I wonder, whom was he thinking. Talia? Someone I do not know of? Some nymph? I smiled.

“Lady Artemis, my lord. I wish to marry her and ask for her hand as my reward.”

There was silence. Astonished, surprised – a lot like the lull before the storm. Hades burst in laughter, shaking. It was a page right out of his book, “how to marry a goddess 101”.

“My daughter is the patron of virginity, boy.”

There was something strange in his voice. A mix of understanding and something I could not quite catch. Zeus was not dumb. He was impulsive, but he understood what I truly meant.

There is no throne for the non-virgin goddess of virginity. Married, she will go against her most sacred vow. She will become a goddess of the hunt, nothing more. No longer a major deity.

She will have no place in the council of the Olympians, freeing a throne. I did not ask for godhood. I asked for the throne in the Council.

“It comes the time for every maiden to lose her virginity, does it not?” I looked at him. “As you had said, I had defeated Kronos, thus saving the Olympus. I believe the time had come.”

Artemis looked at me with true, pure hatred. She understood my plan as well.

“You are a piece of miserable shit!”

“Now, now, Artemis. The boy is obviously in love with you. Don’t be so harsh to him.”

Aphrodite was smirking like a cat that captured a very fat mouse. She knew what I was doing and was more than happy to gloat. Eternal virginity and sex do not go all too well together. Goddess of love rivaled with Artemis from the time immemorial.

The reaction of other Olympians was not so easy to tell.

“Very well.” After a pause, answered Zeus. “If my daughter agrees.”

I looked at Artemis. She was beautiful – even now, with eyes full of contempt, anger, and hatred. Especially now, perhaps. The young woman was glowing with pure moonlight, fully justifying her title of the Radiant.

She burned down cities for less. She killed men that saw her nudity. She murdered her own followers for the crime of being violated.

She was captured by her own oath on the River Styx, willingly given.

And you do not want to break the oath given on the river that kills immortals.

“I agree.” Artemis quietly answered. She was visibly shaking from anger. “But I wish for an appropriate wedding gift.”

I suddenly had an awful feeling.

“I brought you Kronos’ and Hyperion’s heads, my love. I also saved your throne. What other gift do you desire?”

“Prove your love, Perseus. I shall never be second.” Artemis smiled. It was a cold smile of a hunter, that tasted blood. “Bring me what you cherish the most. Bring me Sally Jackson’s head.”

And doom yourself like Orestes.

\---

So basically, I am playing with classical myths and characters in this thread. Cause it is fun and there are a lot of things to explore here.

You may offer your ideas and characters.


	2. Chapter 2

“Sit.”

Father went straight to the point. He was not angry, not really. Tired, mostly. He had that look in the eyes, telling “you fucked up”.

Funny. He was not there to bail me out when cops took me for drunk driving or when we were jumping from landlord to landlord hoping that this one will charge less and allow for extension. He was not there… ever, really. To get him to pay attention to me I only needed to attempt to force myself on a major goddess.

Ironic.

“Would you explain to me what were you thinking?”

I smiled.

“Artemis is hot and I want to have her.”

“Lie.” The ocean god sighed. “Son, I know you better than you think. Do not insult me with your ineptitude.”

“Really? Because, you know, Demeter - wait, you really raped your sister? - Asteria, Medusa – by the way, a nice woman, or was nice when I met her and chopped off her head - I'd say it runs in the family.”

“Don’t list me my lovers. I know them better than you do.” Poseidon sighed. “What you did with Artemis was stupid. And it had nothing to do with her looks or your lust.”

I sighed. The old man knew me just a little too well.

“You want honesty?”

“It would be nice for a change.”

“I want her throne.”

Father nodded.

“I thought so.”

“I was an Olympus errand boy for my entire life. Now what, running errands for you as an ocean minor god? Suck up to the freaking Dionysus? Hell no. I did not refute Kronos’ offer to get an eternity of that.”

Poseidon smiled.

“Why did you refuse him, then?”

“Because he was a loser.”

Father chuckled.

“Very well. Now, tell me, do you truly think you are the first hothead that was tempted by the forbidden virgin in the last two thousand years? My niece did not keep her title through the years doing nothing.”

“Yeh, I read all those myths. She really loves turn people into animals.”

“Poor child. Did you read the stories that were not comfortably written down?”

I paused. Damn.

“So, she has experience. Fine. It only makes it more interesting.”

And it did. I could feel my blood boiling, anticipating a new challenge. If you are fighting against the odds for as long as I do, you will either break down and die or hook up on adrenaline. I loved the challenge. I loved danger. I was not really sane. No man that one on one’d a titan can be sane.

I did not care about Artemis, not really. She was attractive, and she was forbidden – it made her thrice as appealing. She also hated me guts, which made the whole situation interesting. But what was important, Artemis was the only major deity that had a clear clause for removal. That clarity was a trap, of course, but the one who does not risk is the one who is running errands for eternity.

And I am so done with that.

“It does not make it interesting, son. It makes your actions inept.” Father sighed. “Tell me, what are you going to do with her terms?”

I smiled.

“Bring the mother here. Artemis did not mention that she must be dead, exactly. Only that I need to bring her head.”

Poseidon looked at me strangely, and I suddenly felt far less cheerful.

“And do you think that loophole is there by mistake?”

I mean… yes?

Father sighed.

“You will not bring Sally’s head to Artemis because you will not find her.”

Wait…

“What?”

“My niece was playing this game for centuries. If you are lucky, Sally is locked somewhere. Probably in Artemis’ own sanctuary. Or she is halfway to the Elysium now.”

I felt a lump in the throat.

“And if I am not lucky?”

Father smirked. There was no sympathy in his eyes.

“Where did she put her best hunter?”

In the sky. She made a freaking constellation out of him. And I am no Zeus to get him down.

When you deal with the gods as often as I do, you sometimes forget just how chthonic some of them are. Still… I made Kronos my bitch. I can find one person.

“She wouldn’t let her go to Hades. Hercules managed to get a person out of there before reaching the godhood. Constellation… I will ask Pythia about that.”

“Would you really?”

Right, Pythia is Apollo’s personal megaphone. I doubt he will be happy with me trying to rape his twin sister. He killed Orion for less.

“No. No, I will not.” I sighed. “It leaves Artemis sacred places. She wouldn’t trust something so important to stay outside of her control.”

Which will be well protected, and she will be in her right to protect it. Looks like I will have to beat her up before the marriage.

Typical.

“No friend will support you on this road, son.” Poseidon looked at me sternly. “You are going against my niece, and she will call in every favor she has to stop you. And trust me, she collected plenty of those.”

“Does it mean you will also be against me in this endeavor?”

Poseidon shook his head.

“I, Zeus, and Hades will stay away from the wager. Everyone else are free to do their bidding.”

And I just made myself a perfect target for anyone willing to get on Artemis’ good side. Just like in good old days.

“Then bet on me,” I smirked. “When I’ll be done with her, Artemis will forget what chastity means.”

I never expected the road to the true godhood to be easy. I knew what I got myself into when I tried to force myself on the strongest virgin in history.

And besides, I am a god now. It should count for something.

\----

Don't forget to leave comments.


	3. Chapter 3

When you need guidance, you go to the Pythia. As you might have guessed, that was not an option. To be honest, I was out of options now.

Thing is, I am not terribly smart. That is not why they pay me big bucks, and that is not how I got where I am now. I am diligent, stubborn, and resilient, but I am no genius. I am just smart enough to acknowledge that and find someone who will do the thinking for me.

Sure, the big brain will most likely use me for his own gains, but since we are using each other, I am fine with that. I may not trust the person that does the whole thinking thing, but I can trust that he will act in his best interests.

The key here is to figure those out and make sure they align with mine.

Annabeth was doing planning for me before. She will probably kill me now or demand some extra price for her brain services. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, or something along those lines.

Somehow, I was sure that asking a ditched girlfriend for help right after, well, ditching, was not a good idea.

I knew only one person that was smarter than her, but I did not become that desperate yet. Athena is smart, no shit – she is the patron of strategy, long-term planning, corporate governance, and every single ivory tower in the universe.

I preferred Ares, but never tell it to him. The guy is a dick, but he is always down there, on the battlefield. When the only thing between you and two tons of monster meat is a tiny piece of metal in your hands, you will pray to Ares and it does not matter if you like or not.

I had never seen a single man praying to Athena during the battle. Ever.

I doubt she had ever been on the battlefield. All the dirt and blood would have soiled her pristine white toga.

Besides, I fought Ares already. I kicked his ass, then he kicked mine, and we were even.

Athena would have held a grudge for eternity and drowned me in some quarrel a century later.

Which is exactly why I was standing in front of Aphrodite’s altar. The woman was not exactly smart, but she hated Artemis fiercely. Besides, I had publicly declared that I am acting out of love. Or lust.

It made me her subject, in a way. She owed me advice.

Imagine my surprise when instead of the patron of prostitutes and rapists I found a huge mix of wolf and a man behind the altar. And when I say “huge”, I mean a ton of pure canine muscle.

“Who the fuck are you?”

I politely asked.

The wolfman growled and frowned at me. I slammed him into the altar with a streak of boiling water. When you grow up in a camp that was built to teach you to kill monsters, you get some reflexes established.

“Who the fuck are you?”

I was considering cutting off a paw but decided not to. It wouldn’t be polite to pollute the altar with the beast's blood.

Actually, what kind of offerings does Aphrodite like? Sperm? Gold? Tears of heartbroken teenage boys? I never asked Silena about that.

“Lycaon!” Wolfman whined. He was obviously in pain. Hah. I did not think of that. “The king of wolf-kin!”

Ah. Right. The poor sod that decided that to feed Zeus with his son’s meat was a good idea. Considering where Tantalus ended up, I would say he got the long end of the cannibalistic stick.

“Nice to meet you, I am Percy. Would you kindly explain what you are doing here, or should I cut off your paw first?”

He stared at me. I made the water around him a bit wormer. Well, not a bit. He blinked and looked away, roaring in pain.

Don’t try to stare me down, dude. I played that game with Cerberus and won. And he had six pairs of eyes against the two of mine.

“Aphrodite sent me to help you!”

“Very well.” I gave him a reassuring smile. “Do so.”

Lycaon looked hesitant. I raised the water temperature again.

“Apollo will roast me alive for that!”

I sighed. You might think that immortality through Tartar would make monsters braver, but no.

“Come on, man. Artemis farmed you for centuries. For sport. Tell me you have some balls left."

Wolf-king snarled.

"You will die like every imbecile that tried to do her, and Apollo will roast my ass."

"Sweetheart, don't forget that I turned Kronos into a bloody pulp. Talk to me like that again and I will roast you."

“If I’ll tell you, Artemis will tear my balls off and feed them to me!”

“She is far away, you know. While I am here.” I smiled again. “Would you like your balls roasted or boiled?”

The water around him started to boil.

“Wait!” Lycaon screamed. He was shaking. “I’ll talk!”

I heard loud coughing behind me. I turned around. Damn, I became way too invested in the process. A young woman in silver armor, armed with a bow, lance, and shield stood behind me. She had short dark hair, bright blue eyes, and an expression of polite embarrassment. Thalia stood behind me, surrounded by fifteen younger huntresses.

I couldn't help it and smile. She was a friend. An old trusted friend.

"Percy, seriously?" Thalia sighed. “It wasn’t even a day after the victory. I did not have time to take a shower. And you already managed to make me busy.”

Yeh. That is Thalia for you.

“Sorry.”

“Sorry? Percy, ‘sorry’ was when you and Clarisse fucked up the deal with Ares and lost his best chariot. This is a shitshow.”

Yeh. Can’t argue with that.

"What can I say? Things we do for love."

"Really? Dear, keep this bullshit for Annabeth, I know you better than that. The last time when you tried to get into girl’s pants was four years ago, with Annabeth. Half of the Aphrodite Cabin tried to bang you in the meantime, and you didn’t even notice."

Wait. They did?

“Told you.” Thalia sighed. “Percy, you want our lady’s throne. A blind fool can tell that.”

"Guilty." I nodded. "Talia, I am carving myself a hefty piece of godhood here. Please fuck off."

Zeus' daughter changed her stance. She was a champion, through and thorough. A girl you can fight for an hour straight, get electrified twice, and then go and grab a beer together. No hard feelings involved.

"Or what?"

"Or you will arrive at Elysium a bit sooner than you hoped."

She chuckled.

"Really? Percy, I saved your ass in Manhattan. That's how you repay me?"

"I repay you by listening to this shit instead of cutting your pretty head off. Thalia, I will make sure you'll get fast-tracked into heaven if you cross me. That’s it. I value our friendship, but I value my godhood more."

Thalia sighed. She tried to threaten, it failed and now she will try to reason with me.

"Why do you even think father will hand the vacant throne over to you?"

"Ah, that's simple. I will not give him a choice."

She looked at me strangely.

"Percy?"

"I will keep murdering every poor imbecile who'll accept that offer until Zeus will get desperate enough and give it to me."

"Really?"

"It is free entrainment for everyone involved."

Thalia sighed again. Yeh, girl, you know me. What else did you expect?

"By the way, Thalia, what are you doing here? Does Artemis honestly think you can defeat me? Come on. I am a half-god, half titan now. I drank my milk.”

Thalia shook her head.

"She doesn't. We are here to kill Lycaon."

Right. Not like a lot of monsters know the location of Artemis’ sanctuaries. She is only the huntress that kills them for sport, and her sanctuaries are no-go zones for them. They are really hidden, yeh.

“How about you don’t?”

“You want me to betray my goddess?”

“Not betray, just… stay away from the battle? Yeh, that’ll do. Come on, you never wanted the job in the first place. You just jumped on a bandwagon to throw the prophecy at me. Like, sure, I get it, you were scared that daddy dearest will smite you for getting seventeen, but…”

“I wasn’t scared!”

“Yeh, you just accepted ‘all boys are dicks’ policy. No prophesy involved there.”

Thalia eyed me. Lightning sparkled in her eyes.

“Percy, you are an idiot that decided that the world revolves around you. Get your head out of your ass. My lady is ready to forgive you. Just… just turn your brain back on.”

“Wait. Artemis is ready to forgive me?”

“Yeh. You did enough for Olympus and the whole thing with Atlas… she will still be angry, but she is ready to forgive you.”

“Oh, really? Cool. She can forgive me with her mouth.”

Thunder roared in the sky.

“What did you say?”

I gave her my best smile.

“Come on, Thalia, I know that you are a virgin, but didn’t Luke give you the Talk? When mommy and daddy love each other very much, or daddy loves mummy way too much, they…”

“One more word, Percy. One more fucking word.”

“But I care about you, Thalia. Sexual education is important. Had you ever heard about contraception? I will surely never use it with Artemis.”

Air got a strong smell of ozone. Zeus was not in the wager but helping his daughter seemingly did not count. Fair enough.

The said daughter was silent, looking at me with pure murder in her eyes.

“Oh, and Thalia?”

“Yes, Percy?”

“You will call me ‘daddy’ soon.”

The sky turned into one giant lightning bolt, strong enough to burn down a city. I met the lightning with my sword, redirecting the raw energy into the team of huntresses. Water is a damn good conductor.

Sometimes Thalia is just too easy.

\------

Comments, folks. I need them and I read them.


	4. Chapter 4

Thalia survived her own lightning. It was the most reassuring thing I could say about the whole mess. She was standing on one knee, trying to get a hold on her spear. Her fingers were shaking involuntarily.

Yeh, it happens when you put all your power in one strike. I would know, I blew up a volcano once. Still need to apologize to Hephaestus for that. His workshop was there.

A group of young huntresses was now smelling like burned meat. At least three of them were dead. My bride will hate me even stronger now.

Oh well, it is her problem, really. I gave her every opportunity to start to love me on time.

Lycaon sighed. He mostly accepted his fate by now, but still looked upset. Poor thing.

"Are you sure you want to go where we are going? There are less painful ways to kill yourself."

Wolfman crouched in the middle of the deck, trying very hard not to look at the water. Yeh, Acheron can be a bitch to look at. Not as bad as Lethe, which sucked memories away, but still. Not a way you would want to spend your weekends.

"Less whining, more optimism, my friend. Besides, I am already late for a date."

"Date? Are you insane?"

Lycaon looked grim. To be honest he held well. After all, I drugged him into the Underworld with me.

It is not that hard to get there. I mean, it is kinda the point of the whole Underworld thing – the trick is to get out in one piece, not to come in. Hades is a hell of a welcoming owner. Thankfully, Nico showed me plenty of ways to get where I want. And even without his knowledge…

Seriously, the whole Kronos’ army was respawning in Tartarus. Do you really think we would have won the war if we did not cut off his supply lines at a time? I still remember most of the ways in and out of Tartarus by heart.

It was harder to get a ship, but when you are a sea god… yeh. It was not a problem.

"Come on, wolfy, give me some credit. I won the war for Olympus. I know what I am doing."

There was a pause. Lycaon gave me a puzzled look.

"And what are you doing?"

"Accessorizing. You don’t go on a date in pajamas, do you?"

The ship stopped close to the shore. It was looking almost normal – except the sand was black, there was no sky, and water in the river further looked a lot like fire. Phlegethon was huge, shiny and pretty.

Sometimes I wished that Hades was my father instead of Poseidon. I loved the place, and the company here was brilliant.

The captain – a huge male telekhine in a badass captain hat – nodded to me. His crew almost finished preparing a boat. A young telekhine spat on the deck behind my back and suddenly became shorter by a head. Sea demons looked at me with pure hatred in their small black eyes. I gave them a cheerful smile.

I knew those guys could talk, but the captain had his tongue cut off by Kronos long time ago. They owed me one – I did not return to slaughter them after I blew up a volcano in their faces.

One would think they will still hold a grudge. I would love to see them acting on it.

If they will leave with the ship, locking me in the Underworld, I will return and slaughter them. If they won’t, I will give them a happy life full of servitude and sadism. Sometimes you must show your followers your defenseless back.

If they strike, they are too dumb to live.

The boat was tiny and made of bone of a sea creature. I preferred good old steel. Still, it did the job and brought us to the shore fast enough.

You could hear the clash of steel with steel from a kilometer away. Sounds of forging filled the air. That was the place where stygian ore became the stygian steel.

Forging stopped when I came closer.

A huge cyclops stood behind the anvil of black ice. He looked a lot like Tyson, except my brother would have barely reached his foot. He was Brontes, one of the three primordial cyclops. You probably know him as the guy that made Master Bolt.

Yeh, he also made my father’s trident, which made oceans his bitch.

“Hi there! I am Percy Jackson, and now you are working for me!”

Cyclopes simply raised his eyebrow, shook his head, and returned to smithing. I sighed.

“Look, we can do it the hard way and the soft way.”

He ignored me. I raised the Acheron. Well, not all Acheron. The part that was close to the shore. He kept ignoring me. I threw the river at him.

Cyclops met the strike with his anvil. The shield, that he was forging, was crimson from the heat. Very hot steam was now everywhere, and Lycaon screamed. Sucks to be not invincible, I guess.

Brontes put now cooled shield in the sand and sighed loudly.

“Let me guess. You want me to forge you a weapon.”

“Yep.” I eyed him. “And come on, big guy. You are sitting in front of the gates of freaking Tartarus. You are not so easy to find to have a whole line of customers waiting.”

“Which is exactly why I am here,” Brontes muttered. “Do you have any idea how hard is it to concentrate on craftsmanship when every century some young idiot comes knocking and demanding to forge da big hummer to smash the world?”

Well, if you put it like that…

“How about a deal? You work for me, and I make those idiots disappear.”

Brontes chuckled.

“It is the tenths time I am hearing that. Usually, the deal ends with the offeror being busy suffering in Tartarus for eternity.”

“Really? Sure. If I will end up in Tartarus, I will send you a termination letter in advance.”

Cyclopes sighed. He had huge, dirty teeth and stank like a dirty goat. There was a reason why I made Tyson shower twice a day.

“Why are you here, boy?”

“I want you to forge me a weapon.”

“Do you take me for an idiot? If you made it here, you can get yourself a stygian sword without wasting my time. You do not have time to wait for me to forge you something unique. The Virgin of Olympus will find you before I’ll finish.”

Oh, he already knows about Artemis. Cool. Just how fast do gossips travel?

“I doubt it will take that much time, Brontes.”

Cyclopes snarled.

“You know the smithing better than I do?! If I tell you that it will take more time than you have, I mean it.”

I smiled cheerfully.

“I don’t know much about your craft, Brontes, but I know that re-forging takes less time than building from a scratch.”

I unsheathed Anaklusmos… or, to be more precise, a sword that looked a lot like it. It is hard to see the difference when it looks like a pen.

Now, it looked like a roughly made parody on a sword. Greyish, with a shattered edge and the hilt styled as an hourglass lost the lower segment. It was shattered and melted.

I felt something I could not quite put in words. The weapon was wounded. It felt like a cloud of sharp fragments, too small and too shattered to come together. It was useless like that. Barely enough to redirect lightning.

The weapon was forged by the mother of everything that lives, or, as I call her, grandma. It castrated and sliced the all-father to pieces. Its wielder followed his fate. Twice. With my very eager assistance.

Luke turned Manhattan into a piece of swiss cheese with it, and he could barely funnel the tiniest part of its true power without turning his own body to dust in the process. It was a lot like getting a light from a nuclear power plant. You never know what will burn first – the cigarette, you, or the city around.

I did not have that problem. Immortality has its perks.

Brontes chuckled.

“It was interesting to meet you, Perseus Jackson. You may start writing your letter. Zeus will smite you and throw in Tartarus when he’ll learn that you wield that.”

I smiled in return.

“Zeus will throw me in Tartarus regardless.”

Big Z hated competition. I could relate. You do not hold the throne for three millennia by humoring young and daring. For now, he gave me a rope to hang myself. There is no chance in hell I will be able to beat Artemis.

At least that’s what he is thinking. I am more than willing to play along.

“Yes, Yes, he will. I already want to throw you there, and I know you for less than five minutes.”

It made me chuckle. I put the broken scythe on the anvil.

“So, how long will it take? The foundation is done. You only need to repair it.”

Brontes carefully looked at the weapon. I could feel his interest.

“What makes you think I will not rat you out to Zeus?”

“And lose the chance to play with the crowning jewel of your mother’s craftsmanship? I know your reputation, Brontes. You would rather eat your own anvil.”

Cyclops sighed.

“True.” He put the weapon back on the anvil. “Give me a week or so. Now get lost.”

I smiled and returned to the boat. I really hope that the telekhine ship can survive hellfire. I need to talk with someone important.

There are no more loyal friends than the enemies that you put down. You know them, they know you, and both of you have a common interest.

\----

Don't forget to comment, folks. Your theories are more valuable than you think.


	5. Chapter 5

When shadows crawled into something looking suspiciously like a human figure, I smirked and stole the captain hat from the telekhine. It looked awesome on me.

“Welcome aboard! You are right on time.”

Nico looked a bit startled. He had pale white skin, dark hair, and expression of stiff shyness on his face.

“I am?” He wondered and shook his head. “Wait, you expected me to come?”

I did not, but he didn’t need to know that.

“It is your home, Nico. Would you leave me waiting?”

I chuckled. Hades’ son sighed loudly. He was one of my most prized possessions – smart, competent, and he knows his way around the only part of the world that matters.

He also tried to kill me and failed. I would not have respected him otherwise.

“Right. Right.” He shook his head. “That aside, what the fuck are you doing here?”

I felt a sudden déjà vu.

“Preparing for a date.” I chuckled. “And looking for a company.”

“In Tartarus? Percy, you are even allowed here only because I covered your ass from the father. And even then, I am not sure if it really fooled him.” Nico looked around, noticing our company. “And why do telchines work as a personal Uber for you now?”

That was easy.

“Because I ordered them to, of course.”

Nico looked unimpressed.

“Since when you get to order monsters around? Can’t they just refuse to come, or something?”

“They sure can. But they won’t.”

“Why?”

“Let’s say I am practicing in statecraft.”

“Meaning?”

“If I’ll summon them and they won’t come, I will come after them myself. And if the reason for their absence won’t kill them before me, I will torture their whole tribe to death.”

There was a pause. Nico shook his head. He still looked unimpressed.

“What? That’s how authority works.” I shrugged. “Besides, if they’ll behave, I will allow them to serve as my boys among their kind.”

“And they will want it because why? Their kin hates your guts. And me, for clarity. They can drown us in Phlegethon and pretend it never happened.”

“Mainly because they can pillage, rape, and collect tribute in my name for as much as they want, and no one will make a fuss.”

“Because if they will, you will come and torture them to death.”

“Exactly.” I smiled. “That’s how the government works.”

A short silence followed. Nico sighed defeatedly.

“Remind me, why didn’t you support Kronos again?”

That was a valid question. Nico himself was sitting on a fence for years, without taking sides. Hades was smart enough to bet on the winner.

“Because he was an imbecile.”

“I am serious, Percy.”

Hah. It was important for him, wasn’t it?

“He chose Luke, Nico. Luke! How stupid you need to be to choose him as your champion?”

“Percy?”

“He knew I was there. He saw me in action. And he chose him! What the fuck was he thinking?”

“Seriously?”

“Just think about it, damn it. I was there, all young and powerful, and talented, and he decided that Luke will get the job done. How dumb you must be to think that?”

“Wait. Wait.” Nico eyed me. “You are saying, you were fighting Kronos because he… ditched you?”

“I fought him because he was a cretin that failed to appreciate my potential. Who would ever bet on him after that?”

“Right. Okay. Whatever.” Nico sighed. “The whole fuss about Artemis. What’s up with that?”

Wrong question, my dear. Wrong question.

“You mean, ‘why didn’t I tell you about it?’, don’t you?”

“Yes!” Nico looked bitter. “I am your friend, Percy. I was looking after your back through the whole war. Now you are starting another, and I have to look for you like a fucking lost dog!”

Wrong reason, Nico. I know you. You could not care less for misinformation. You have control over shadows for a reason. Like someone can keep anything in secret from you.

“Jealous, are we?”

I could have slapped him instead. Nico blushed furiously, choking. I smirked and whispered in his ear:

“I do whoever I want, wherever I want and whenever I like. Today I want Artemis. Simple as that.”

Nico blushed again. He was staring. I allowed him to. I was not terribly interested, but I am the kind of guy that appreciates being appreciated. I put the captain hat on his hair.

“Percy, you are good, but...”

“Good? I am the best that ever been.” I whispered. “And you know it.”

Nico blushes again. Dear Aphrodite, you are a bitch, but I love you. You are making my life so incredibly easy.

“Percy!”

“Take what you want, Nico. Bianca did. It killed her, but she got the time of her life.” I smiled and stepped back. “Now, back do business. I need to talk to a guy that you probably heard of, and I want you to watch my back.”

“Sure.” He smiled eagerly. “You know, I will always...”

“Watch my... back. I know.” I smirked. “I trust you.”

He was just too easy. And I do love being appreciated.

\-----

Yes, Nico’s crash on Percy is canon. No, I am not going to write the gay storyline in any detail - not my cup of tea - and it will never go any further than teasing of poor Nico boy. But since it is a story about Classical Greek heroes of all things, I had decided to include this part into the fic and not politely ignore it as authors usually do.

Because seriously, Greek fucking heroes. It is hard to find a single straight hero among them.

And yes, Percy is a cunt that abuses Nico’s feelings. I know. That’s Theseus for you.


	6. Chapter 6

Tartar was not what I expected it to be. It was not scary. There were no screams of the tortured sinners, and no monster army to kill. It was hot, it was empty, and it was exhausting.

And it was fucking terrifying.

Do not get me wrong, I am a guy who is fairly hard to scare.

I fought gods more than once. I made the lord of the East my bitch. I blew up volcanos and drowned whole fleets. I butchered witches and magicians, priests and shadowbinders, cyclops, chimeras, and dragons. My first kill was a minotaur, and I am still proud of it. I took every monster that the ancient world could throw at me, killed it, and asked for more.

I was terrified like a little girl in front of her drunk stepfather with a hard-on now.

There was nothing anthropomorphic about being in front of me.

It did not have a body. There were no eyes, no mouth, no hands, and no legs. There were no tentacles – nothing. It was almost like it was not even here. There was absolutely nothing resembling a creature, only presence. And it was enough to make me flinch.

Do you have any idea how huge the world is? You don't. You know continents, the pieces of clay slapped together for a millennium or two. You know oceans, tiny puddles of dirty water. They are nothing but the tiniest part of the existing world.

I felt it – the shifts of the lithosphere and the little sun inside of the planet core. I felt it – every single grain of sand, and every wave of heat coming from the inner core. Billions of years. Energy, that became matter, and matter, that turned back into energy.

I felt it, and it noticed me.

It was sentient.

‘It’ was, in fact, ‘she’.

I swallowed.

“Hi, grandma.”

A voice came out of the darkness, a sound that almost blew up my ears from inside. "Me," it said, drawing the word out. "You dared to search for me."

I didn’t. If anything, I wanted to stay as far away from her as I possibly could, and then some. I looked for Krios, lord of the South, stars, and constellations. Not for his psycho mom.

"You dare to contravene? You dare to come into my halls and draw my attention?"

"N-n-nngh, ow." I gasped. It was the most I managed to get out of my mouth. “Ngha!”

The bonds around me could not have been made from matter. And they were not made of energy, either. Somehow, I was sure of it. Will. Gaea was holding me down with a pure, relentless will. My body was not moving because she decided that is how reality works now.

Every bit of power that I earned, gambled, took, and gained meant nothing here. Cold, calm will swooped around me, crafting chains stronger than hope. I was rather proud of my newfound immortality, but she could unmake me with a single thought.

“You dare to come into my halls in a dirty, mortal coil.”

Pure disgust in her voice hit me from the inside like a star explosion. To fight it was like trying to shield yourself with an umbrella from a nuclear strike.

My body, enhanced and hardened with water from the River Styx, was stripped away. I felt salt on my lips, sea breeze, cold strength of the ocean that was trying to protect me – everything I got by the virtue of being the son of Poseidon - and lost it. It melted away in the primordial fire.

I did not fight it. I embraced it.

For all intends and purposes, I had died.

Except I didn’t.

"My son," said Gaea in a tone of pure disgust. "Was too much of romantic."

I did not say anything. I was not feeling suicidal enough for that.

"He spent too much time ruling mortals." She continued. "Mortals in their soft, comfortable world. Mortals with nothing to do but fight one another, who have forgotten why they should fear the fangs and the claws, the cold and the dark."

Right. I could say a lot to that, but again. Damn. It was the first time in many, many years when I was too terrified to throw a witty remark. Chiron would have killed to see that.

“You scattered my son, mortal.”

It wasn’t an accusation, more a statement of fact.

“In my defense, he was a cunt.”

Gaea chuckled.

“You will have to become a bigger one.”

Wait what?

“Kronos failed the task I had bestowed upon him. You shall continue what he started.”

“Meaning?” I looked at her. I still had no idea what Kronos' goal was besides getting the Olympus titanic again. “Do you want a shiny mountain that much? Come on, you have all of the earth already.”

“Keep the mountain,” Gaea answered. “Bring me the staff of my useless husband.”

Oh. I doubt she wants it out of pure sentimentality for some reason. Wait. The staff of Ouranos, his symbol of power... it looks like someone got bored of being locked in the world basement.

"Where can I find it?"

"Only Zeus knows. Tear that knowledge out of him."

That I can do. In fact, I will have fun doing that.

“And if I fail?”

“I invite you to contemplate the consequences of that.”

She did not elaborate. Somehow it only made it scarier.


	7. Chapter 7

My new body was… strange? It was the wrong word. I doubt it could be even called “body” at all. It looked like one if the reflection in Acheron could be trusted, but it did not feel like one. It felt... yeh. Strange.

“Nico?”

“Hm?”

An old friend was napping on the deck. I wish I had his nerves. Actually…

“Did you notice anything?”

Nico looked at me, closed his eyes, and concentrated. He knew me better than to ask stupid questions. He shook his head, slowly.

“No. Is something wrong with the water?”

He either slept through the whole Gaya’s entrance, or it happened only to me. Considering where we are, I have no idea which one is closer to the truth.

“Not sure. Give me your sword.”

He did exactly that, no questions asked. And people keep asking me why I enjoy working with the ever brooding Nico. He doesn’t ask dumb questions, that’s why.

A short sword made of stygian steel did not burn my hands as I expected it to. And it was freaking strange. This thing was made of concentrated death. You can count people that can wield it safely by the fingers of one hand, and all of them came to life from Hades fucking around.

I was not one of them. Brontes’ offer to get me a sword made of stygian steel was a trick question. It would have been useless at best or straight up killed me at worst.

And yet here I was, holding a piece of cursed steel like it is a piece of aluminum.

“Percy?”

Nico eyed me carefully. Instead of answering I carefully cut the skin on my palm. There was a strange, almost forgotten feeling – and blood followed. I felt pain again.

Styx no longer protected me.

“Holy… Percy!” Nico jumped and rushed to me. He looked startled. “Why… why do you bleed ichor?”

He was right. My blood had a golden color now.

“I guess that’s how titanhood looks like.”

I answered quietly.

I tried to touch Acheron, to raise it, to feel it – and found nothing. Water was still there, but it no longer welcomed me. My connection with the sea was severed. Melted in the primordial fire.

I never understood how much I was leaning on the ocean to support me before. Water was everywhere – in the rivers and underground lakes. In the freaking sewerage. It was there, always willing to help, to heal my wounds, and to lend additional strength.

I was alone now.

I guess that is how the child feels when he can no longer fit in his cradle.

“We are leaving,” I whispered. “This quest is over.”

Nico looked at me, quietly shook his head, but said nothing. Shadows came to life around us, coming together in the shape of a gate.

“Where?”

Good question, really. Where do I go now? I was no longer of Poseidon blood. I was on my own now. Regardless. I made my choice.

You can’t learn to walk until you throw away the crutches.

Zeus would have turned me into a minor sea god, and my father would have slapped a pretty title on top of it. Title, void of everything but a name.

I made my choice. Now I will live with it.

I looked at the telchine. They saw too much. I looked at the sword in my hands and decided against it. Too much of an honor. I lost my sea. I could not throw it at them.

And thus I did the only reasonable thing I could. I followed Gaya’s example.

I willed them not to be.

There was a burst of light - and, just like that, they were no more. Only a tiny pile of ash remained.

The lord of heat, light, and power, hah?

“Let there be light.” I chuckled. “Take us home, Nico.”

And so he did.


	8. Chapter 8

The camp was… the camp. It was loud, full of people with weapons, symbols of gods and it was home. For me at least. Not so much for Nico.

Because, for starters, Hades’ children did not even have their own cabin in the camp. Either they gave the guy some unrealistic credit in terms of faithfulness, or whoever made the camp was a dick.

Since even Hera and Artemis had their own cabins, I would say it was the latter. I let Nico stay in my cabin for a couple of months, and it was awkward. But still better than Hermes’ dormitory.

It was lunchtime and the camp was feasting. It wasn’t much of a feast, to be honest – a glorified barbecue with soft drinks.

Dents in their numbers were almost physically painful to see.

When we came to the tables, silence followed. I didn’t seat at Poseidon’s table. I went to the center of the hall instead.

“How are the celebrations going?”

There was silence. Fellow demigods looked at me with a mix of apprehension and, in some cases, respect. Nico carefully stood a step behind my left shoulder.

“Percy…”

Trevis answered, ever uncertain.

“How is the victory treating you, me fellow men and ladies?”

Folks nervously looked at each other. I smiled. A week has passed – enough to count losses.

“I was absent for a whole week. I did not come to the funeral. I know what you are thinking, folks. I am a cunt that did well for myself and ditched his brothers. I’ve got godhood, power and soon will have Artemis as a prize out of this war, while you all bled. I led you to this war, and I got my reward. But what did you get?!”

I shouted and pointed at Trevi's.

“Trevis, my friend, you fought in the front lines. You led the assault on the Manhattan bridge and took it. You bled and fought like a true warrior in the name of your father - now, tell me, what did you get out of it? What godly reward was bestowed upon you in graditude?”

Trevis looked reluctant.

“M...”

He blushed. He should not have – I was sure everyone noticed his escapade on the victory banquet. I surely did.

“Come on, share with us. Let us cheer for your success, brother!”

Trevis sighed.

“Messina…” He blushed fiercely. “I…”

I smirked.

“You got to fuck a nymph! Good man! T’was good! Few things are better than nymphs’ lips around your cock, am I right, folks? Congratulations, brother! You deserved it!”

Trevis looked down, almost burning from shame. I heard laughs among the crowd. I dropped the smile.

“Now tell me, my friend, was the fuck good enough for three of your brothers to die for?”

Silence ensued. Chuckled died on my fellow heroes' lips. Trevis suddenly turned pale.

“I...”

I ignored him.

“Austin, you held the Brooklyn bridge with all your house. Half of your squad died there. Tell me, what did you get for their sacrifice?”

He looked at me, unsure of what to say. Finally, he answered:

“A sword. Father gave me his sword!”

I looked him in the eyes.

“Was it worth it?”

He tried to answer. I ignored him.

“Clarisse, Silena gave up her life to bring you to the battle. You murdered the freaking drake and saved us all. How did Ares reward you?”

She looked at me, startled. She did not answer.

She got his blessing and a pat on the back.

“You know what I think, brothers and sisters? Our dearest parents forgot how to share.” I smiled, listening to silence. It was incredible. In the last week, I almost forgot how orgasmic it is too rule – to control. The thrill of being followed. “They divided the pie millennia ago, and now throwing leftovers for us. We bleed for them, we die in their name, and what do we get? A pat on the back, a good fuck with a nature spirit, and a new weapon! Fucking dogs are treated better than that!”

I looked at them, waiting for a response. Allowing the pause to last.

“I led you to the battle. I led you to your death. I killed Hyperion, I crushed Kronos, and I waited for a freaking week to see what our parents will do in gratitude without being asked. By their own will.” I smirked “That’s what! They will pat us on the back and throw back in flame. Again.”

I kicked the Zeus table, full of food that will not be eaten. The table, full of sacrificial food, rolled over, rumbling.

“You won the war, guys. Not the gods. You went to hell and back. You stood against everything Kronos could throw at you, and you freaking won!” I screamed. “Where the fuck is your reward?! Where is a good damn food, not a freaking barbecue? The camp is trading strawberries again. Strawberries! Where are the concubines? Riches? Power? Gods are ruling the whole world, and we are living in a shitty summer camp and sleep in rusty houses on bunk beds.”

Had Luke or Thalia been here, they would have answered. Houses were in fine condition, food was, in fact, better than average and the place was safe, which is an extremely valuable commodity in our world.

But every single person that had enough authority to argue with me was either out of the camp or dead. It was a war. Shit happens.

The only exception was looking at me with boredom in the gray eyes, twirling a golden lock on her finger. Annabeth had already figured the whole spectacle out and was waiting for me to finish.

Knowing her, she probably expected something like that from the moment I entered the hall.

I looked at her and raised my eyebrow. She shrugged and indulged me.

“Nice speech, Seaweed Brain. I loved the part about the nymph’s lips around your cock.” Short laughs followed. Annabeth smirked. “You forget a tiny detail. Our parents are gods. We can’t fight them.”

And that’s why I love her.

“We don’t need to fight them,” I answered. “Gods need us. They need cannon fodder to hide their thrones behind. They need to keep throwing someone at titans and monsters. They need agents of their will in the mortal world, and I am damned if I will allow our sacrifice to be valued so cheaply any longer! We lost every third brother or sister in the war. If they want us to bleed, they better fucking pay for it! And pay well!”

Annabeth smiled.

“So what do you want? To start a union?”

I couldn’t help it and left chuckle. Yeh. It would’ve been nice. Actually… hah.

“I want justice!” I screamed. “For you, guys. You fought for the gods; you covered their thrones with your own very mortal bodies. You deserve a proper reward. If I was good enough to get immortality for killing Kronos, Clarisse is good enough too – we all would have been dead without her. Annabeth, you planned the whole damn campaign. You deserve it. Nico, you brought Hades and his army at our side and fucking deserves it, too!”

Now that got a response.

“I want to join the Olympus council. I want to give you, guys, a god that can understand you. I want you to follow me in every battle as you followed me against Kronos. I want to carve us a piece of the pie, and to remind our dearest parents that they need to learn how to share! I want to get us cash, influence, and promotions!”

I smiled.

“And I want to bang Artemis, because I am the freaking hero and because I can!”


End file.
